My Guru once pointed out that my only problem in life is Pramaad (Laziness – lack of discipline). There has always been a resistance in me to initiate movement even towards that which I desire the most. The need to stay inert has always been stronger than desire to achieve and accomplish. As a result even though I LOVE meditating I have never developed a habit to meditate.
Tomorrow morning that changes. You see I realized something. Not meditating requires activity. If I want inertia, if I want to be lazy, I should meditate. What can be lazier than closing my eyes and finding beauty within!
Yes I know what you are thinking and don’t say it. THIS is what I am telling my mind and THIS is what I will believe for the next 21 days.
Now, I promised to daily experience compassion, love and beauty with Unmukt, so he and I shall do this together for 21 days.
Beauty Compassion and Love cannot be explained, only experienced. This is where we started our reflective journey. Last week we joined my sister, her husband, a friend of hers and my parents for a vacation of 4 days. During this trip Beauty Compassion and Love amalgamated to present themselves as Grace.
My sister Somu often spoke of Bow Lake in Canada as a mystical place of stillness where all thoughts cease. Last time I visited Bo lake with her was in November 2017. During that trip I experienced no such stillness and attributed it to traveling with my toddler son Unmukt. Therefore, this time when someone expressed hope of a similar experience my knee jerk response was “I doubt it since we are traveling with this loud one.” A few moments later the highway began running parallel to waters of Bow River and despite utter chaos in the car I found my mind still. It lasted for a minute till the water was visible. After that every time waters of Bow became visible my mind stilled.
I understood it as Bhagwati’s grace. Lovingly she was reminding me that the stillness within is ever present unaffected by the chaotic cacophony around us. It simply waits for us to be felt. That evening she sent me another message through my little one.
Unmukt asked for the story of Kanakdhara Stotram as we waited to be served at Fairmont Chateau Lake Louise. At the end of the story he wanted to hear the stotra. Since I don’t have it memorized my father pulled it up on YouTube. The video had Lakshmi’s image and Unmukt asked “Why does Devi hold the Lotus?”
Mother holds a Lotus flower to remind us that just as a Lotus is born in muddy waters but never immerses in it so should we live in the Sansara (world). Never immersed always floating above it spreading the fragrance of our essence.
